This list appeared in the L.A. weekly late last year, I did a spit take while reading it:

FROM THE L.A. WHITE PAGES (A-K)
1. Sock Won Ahn
2. Flores Atonal
3. Sadsamboon Auskundey
4. Juan Baez
5. Betty Ballnik
6. Charles Balls
7. Tasha Baloney
8. Young Duk Bang
9. Olufemi Banjo
10. R. Beaglehole
11. B.B. Beans
12. Miyojo Beauregard
13. Fnu Beauty
14. Bonnie Beavers
15. Minnie Beavers
16. Bertha Beggs
17. Yuk Lam Chow
18. A. Beveridge
19. Melody Bible
20. Gaspard Bigumanshaka
21. Boris Bimbad
22. Homeric Bio
23. Bad Bird
24. Maria Bizarro
25. Tipton Blish
26. Tatiana Bliss
27. Xavorie Blithe
28. Gene Blood
29. Joe Blow
30. Brenda Bone
31. D. Boone
32. Bob Boop
33. Walled Booze
34. Desiree Botts
35. Roddy Bottum
36. Harry Box
37. Dora Bozo
38. Zil Brill
39. Bing Bu
40. Elmo Bugg
41. Yolanda Buggs
42. Chester Bumper
43. Fuller Bumpers
44. Seymour Bush
45. Harry Butole
46. Bambi Canada
47. Andre Canty-Swapp 48. Clint Catalyst
49. Garland Cheeks
50. Tom Chestnutwood
51. Pick Chew
52. Merrily Chopp
53. Jew Chow
54. Yuk Lam Chow
55. Lolita Corpus
56. Kelly Cream
57. Clarice Crisp
58. Goldie Crummie
59. Catalina Cruz
60. Phuoc Cum
61. Aftan Dada
62. Jeffrey Damnit
63. Long Dang
64. Phat Dong
65. Ima Diva
66. Slippy Dogg
67. Peppermint Dooley
68. Lesbia Dubon
69. Nap Dung
70. Bert Dunk
71. Phuc Duong
72. Hope Faust
73. Foxy Felt
74. Misty Flatt
75. Stone Fleshman
76. P. Flushman
77. Buffy Frankenstein
78. Eric Fromm
79. M. Gandhi
80. Fanny Gay
81. Chuckles Geddes
82. Happy Gilmour
83. Pride Grinn
84. Ha Ha
85. Suk Ham
86. Ida Harden
87. O. Harder
88. Bong Hipolito
89. Bich Ho
90. Phuc A Ho
91. Harry Hyman
92. Hoo Tin Jew
93. Brigit Jones
94. Keng Kong

What we need is a "phone book" reading - like a poetry reading - solemnly intoning each of those names slowly and clearly. Some of those are laugh-out-loud