My bestfriends grandma passed away monday morning, she called me at work and i immediatly told my boss i need to leave i had an emergency just to be by her side, I know grandmas pass away all the time but this is different. Her mother and father both passed before she was 11 years old, and till now her grandmother has served as her mother. So of course I was close to her as well spending many nights at her house and grubbing on grandmas cooking...

To make a long story short Thursday night was the "wake" and I called and called and got no answer of information as to where the services were held.

Today is a viewing from 8-12 i called and its like a private thing were you go in a room by yourself and say your goodbyes which i don't wanna do. At 3pm is the funeral/burial but i feel thats like to private and I dont plan on going. I feel bad for not going but i hope she understands that i dont handle these things well. What do you guys think? Am I a bad friend/person for not going ?

Just tell her how you feel about it.
and express how you want to be there in her "time of need" but as far as going to the events, it's hard for you.

I don't think your a bad friend, just be sure she knows why your not there.

awww.....just tell her you're there for her, but you can't make it because of work or personal reasons...like it's hard going to those things. I'm sure she'll understand.

yeah, just tell her whats up. I'm sure she'll be fine with it. But don't leave her hanging

Ugh..Death is so difficult to deal with..If she didn't call to tell you the details, she's probably not comfortable with you there anyways..Or maybe she just wants to keep it family..When my friend's mom passed, he didn't call me to tell me or anything..I heard it through another friend..I gave it a few days and called him just to tell him that I was there for him if he needed anything..I wasn't going to bring it up, but if he wanted to talk, I was there..Later he told me that was the nicest thing anyone did for him when she passed..I say you do the same..

You're an awesome person, Turtle! I'm sure you're an even more awesome best friend! You know what to do..

just call them and explain, even if they're mad at first it'll be down to emotion. you're not a bad person and you're an awesome friend, death is really personal, it affects everyone differently. hope that helped

I didn't give details to my friends about my dad's funeral..I knew I was going to be too busy mourning to deal with them..I just wanted to be with my sisters and brothers..She might feel the same..